Monday, October 15, 2007

Conservatives Are Assholes

have you been paying attention to the news lately? i'm not sure what's up with the republicans as of late.... but they seem to be going out of their way to be real assholes lately.

i mean... i'm used to them being dicks. but what's going on?

maybe they know they don't have a shot in hell of winning the white house in 2008 nor capitol hill. so maybe they're going for broke...?

but jesus..... what the hell?

fuck the children
president bush in an unashamed "fuck you" to the children in this country decided to veto a bipartisan bill that would expand SCHIP (state children's health insurance programs) to a wider number of poor children.

"they make too much money," forty-three argues.

well, excuse the shit out of us.....

now. ask any of my friends - i hate the little fuckers. children annoy the shit out of me and they're not much good unless they can mix a mean cocktail.... but i would never be enough of a dick to deny them health insurance.

in a response to why he vetoed the bill, W offered this:
my job is a decision-making job, and as a result, i make a lot of decisions... [i'm here] to explain the philosophy behind some of the decisions i’ve made.
and they say the days of lincoln and douglas are dead.....

so....let me get this straight: you can spend over $460 BILLION on the war in iraq.... but you can't spare $35 billion for children?

sick children.....?

you dick.

oh....but wait. it gets better.....

in response to bush's veto the dems allowed a child on SCHIP to deliver the democratic radio response. graeme frost is a 12 year old that spent a week in a coma after a 2004 SUV crash. his sister's injuries were even worse.

the dems decided to put a face on bush's veto and what did the conservatives do?

they swift-boated the little bugger!

conservative bloggers everywhere have dug deep, deep, deep into the life of graeme frost and published just about every bit of money the family has..... i'm pretty sure they found out how much they spent on toilet paper last month.

they're attempting to paint the family as rich and well beyond the need of government assistance. one blogger went so far as to include that the parent's wedding was announced in the new york times!

well, then yes... surely they have too much money. those fucking liberal bastards... the new york times, no less!

that must've really pissed off the conservatives... maybe if it had been a rupert murdoch how-to-lower-the-public-discourse-even-further-by-creating-more-intellectually-insulting-reality-shows-where-we-pimp-out-our-mates kind of announcement? or maybe just the post?

at any rate... what fuckers. attacking a 12-year old to assist your soulless leader. have they really no shame? at long last, fuckers, have you no sense of decency?

the grand asshole
some people never disappoint.....

i'm pretty sure this story got some press back when it first happened.... but no one could talk about it too much while the case was still underway.

remember shawn hornbeck? the missouri kid that was kidnapped for 4 years when the police finally found him while searching for another kidnapped boy. he was being held by michael devlin who has now plead guilty to 80 counts of child abduction and molestation.

well, back when this all came out... that grand asshole, bill o'reilly, made some rather sweet comments about shawn.

"there was an element here that this kid liked about his circumstance," bill-o said. he goes on to say that shawn had "more fun" with his abductor than his parents and that he probably liked not having to attend school. when greta said "some kids like school" bill quickly replied: "well, i don't believe this kid did."

because they were such close fucking friends....

bill o'reilly.... tonight's worst. person. in the world!

i mean....can you believe this shit? implying that shawn hornbeck, at age eleven, liked being held prisoner, molested and pleading for his life.

why, bill, you piece of human waste.

the parents of shawn hornbeck now want an apology from o'reilly... now that the case is over we can talk about everything. but wait for it....

bill-o is saying he doesn't want to put the kid through anything further now that this awful nightmare is behind him.

unanimously please: FUCK YOU, BILL!

speaking of cunts....
have you heard about ann coulter.....?

ann was on the donny deutsch show promoting her most recent book of instructions on how to be a soulless slag when the she suggested the united states would be a better place without jews and that they should be perfected into christians.

ann....mahmoud. mahmoud....ann. may you both rot in hell (if there is such a place, which there probably isn't.... so fuck you both anyway).

when deutsch attempted to give her an out she replied, "no, we just want jews to be perfected, as they say. ... that's what christianity is."

really....? can i get a ruling on that?

i mean.... i hate christians as much as the next person.... but i give them a bit more credit than this douche bag. and with the complete understanding that there's a whole conservative following out there that eats up every pearl of shit ann pinches out and they believe this whole-heartedly.

and really..... that's why conservatives are assholes.

can i get an "amen"?

e.

p.s. meet the press quote of the week
my grandest apologies, o' loyal readers.... but bill cosby was tim's guest for the entire hour this sunday and....in all honesty....i just couldn't listen to the man for an entire hour.

forgive me. i promise to be better next week.

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