well....the chairs were delivered on friday. they're in. all eighteen of them. they're situated. it appears they'll work fine.
and as promised, i went home friday night and i... well, i opened a cab and popped a lovely white pill. somewhere deep within my recesses i knew to open the pinot and indulge in the blue pill would be premature.
and it would have been....
i spent four hours today schlepping around houston looking at dvd players... flat screen televisions... and more goddamned carpet samples....
not to mention lunch with my boss who was "starving" so made us stop and eat. and a side trip to her bank because her CD had matured.
jesus slap-happy christ. i wanted to die.
dr. kevorkian! take me away.....!
and why spend $110 on a five-disc dvd player when surely spending over $300 on a 400-disc changer makes so much more sense for a non-profit.
and the flatscreen! fuck me! the clients... they loooooove the new look of the waiting room. but they're all asking for a fucking flatscreen now. a client today told us we needed two!
"and can i get you a mojito while i massage the bottom of your feet with my tongue?"
oh...and the waiting room. the lovely chairs turned out to be dead when i was assured they wouldn't be dead. (they're leather...for those of you who cannot discern my meaning.)
and wicker, wicker everywhere....
some tibetan welcome symbol hangs next to a tchotchke of some mandarin man's jacket which stands next to a three-paneled photograph of black stones and soothing sand.
so we have consistency now... at least.
oh! and she's installed some ginormous, fucking tiki umbrella right in the middle of the waiting room. you know... for those ever-threatening, 40% chance of rain, houston summer afternoons. plus... i'd hate for any of my clients to sunburn... in the middle of the fucking waiting room.
oh... and the lights are out. she's turned off all the overhead lighting and now all we have are some lovely ikea lamps. and it's been overcast lately so it's dark in there...
and i don't want to imply that any of my clients are slutty... but i really feel as if i need to pop my head in the waiting room every half hour for a periodic hand check. "hands! let me see your hands!"
i mean, in that darkness...? vishnu only knows where my clients' hands might wander.
and now she's trying to redecorate my office again and i'll be goddamned if she's gonna touch my shit.
i'm oddly septuagenarian about my office... "leave my battered ole recliner alone, bitch!"
but the past several weeks... trudging my way to hell and back... trying to work hard in order to ensure that everything comes together for both staff and clients... it made me realize how much i dearly miss illegal substances.
i really think i could have eased through this entire mess much better had i been coked to the gills.
oh well... the bottle of pinot still awaits... and that little blue pill keeps staring me in the face every time i visit my medicine cabinet.
but it'll happen....
and someday soon the combination of wine and prescription medication will sooth my heart into a lull and i'll dance a highland fling in my head while i slip softly into a coma... hoping to wake up in five months and find this entire redesign nightmare behind me.
until then... this chardonnay isn't bad.
e.
No comments:
Post a Comment