Live Blogging the State of the Union

my set is tuned to msnbc and i have a glass of wine beside me. i shall attempt to live blog the state of the union address (bush's seventh and final address... thank buddha!) and provide my thoughts as the idiot speaks.

this, of course, all depends on my lovely hand-me-down laptop surviving through the festivities. we shall see.

some preliminaries
i see that senator obama walked in with both senators claire mccaskell of missouri and ted kennedy of massachusetts. they'll always be bosom buddies!

senator clinton just walked in with senators dodd and biden, as well as jim webb - often mentioned as a potential running mate.

dick and nancy are presiding... always interesting to see the prince of darkness sitting next to ms. liberal san francisco.

just spotted congresswoman sheila jackson lee...forgoing her usual red dress for green this evening.

by the way... i understand that mccain is too busy in florida to attend the address this evening. what a shithead.... of course, he's probably losing to romney tomorrow and thus the nomination. i'd be thrilled if a dem could run against flip-flop mitt.

here comes roberts and alito... fuckers both. chris matthews is right (kills me to say that) - the court will go down as one of bush's great successes... he pushed it to the right.

laura's in red looking like a two, well, fifty-dollar whore. oh - and the twins! how sweet....

fuck you, condi.

michael chertoff always looks like he's on highly active anti-retro viral therapy to me. i know that's a shitty thing to say... but whaddayagonnado?

and here comes the asshole.... followed by john and steny and harry.

oh - hillary is right behind the joint chiefs.

the address
and he begins at 8:09 CST. god, i hate him.....

not some bad opening remarks. always that underlying threat of fear.

8:12...he brought up the economy. at least he understands priority - even if mccain doesn't. followed by a warning to dems not to pad the stimulus package... of course, he wants it focused on big business and not the poor and middle class who really need it.

okay...funny IRS joke about checks and money orders. but that fucking smirk!

our first GOP standing ovation - democrat non-standing moment: 8:15.

151 wasteful programs he wants eliminated.... saving billions. how much would we save if we ended the war in iraq, mr. president?

strong veto threat... of course, he never threatened that with a republican-controlled congress. but he really wants pork and ear-marks eliminated. we can all agree on that...

(does nancy have something stuck in her teeth? what is she doing back there?)

health care? now...health care?

ummmm....i think A LOT of people can argue against no child left behind's success.

ted kennedy has heard all this bullshit before.

i think dick cheney is having a stroke. no, wait - he's still with us.

"made in the u.s.a.?" but how will wal-mart survive?

yes...colombia is a friend of america... god, i miss the days of cocaine.

8:25 - we've returned to the theme of eliminating our dependence on oil... does anyone really think he cares?

it's NUCLEAR! NUCLEAR!

8:26 and my wine is gone... shit.

increase scientific study... but still limit stem cell research, right? i mean - give some but nothing important. "life and science" garnered a shot of the supreme court. hmmm....

oh - the republican party just loves their fetuses!

fuck your judges!

not much interest in his charitable choice... from either side.

awww.... bush won't follow through on his promise to rebuild new orleans but he will throw some business their way. that's nice. between the BCS and the north american summit... NOLA should be set.

8:33 - immigration. fences...whatever. i agree that we need a lawful way to allow immigrant workers to come here and work. one of the few issues i agree on with the president. we need humane ways to deal with illegal immigrants... we can't just send them all back. our economy would suffer.

yeah - ink-stained fingers... that's done a world of good over there.

there are some tired people out there... or are they bored.

8:36 - our first 9/11 remark. wow - nearly 30 minutes. that must be a record. how could he hold out so long? rudy must be amazed at the discipline.

"we are spreading the hope of freedom." and angering the fundamentalists... and causing the death of thousands of innocents....

oh! president bush finally remembered that other country... what's it called again? afghanistan? kinda forgot about that country....

oooooooh - he just adopted his serious voice. "iraq." ooooooh - serious. serious bush. not smirky, jackass bush.

yes, yes... thank you soldiers. you occupy very well.

"the anbar awakening" - isn't that a book by kate chopin?

biden is so very unimpressed. i hope he's our next secretary of state. fuck you, condi!

farewell, senator warner.... you were an honorable man.

"some may deny the surge is working but among the terrorists there is no doubt." that's his power line of the evening. there's that "return on success" line again. i still don't get that line... but we haven't heard it in a long time.

can't we get some hot military men up in the gallery? the bush twins must be dry as a bone up there next to these guys.

so....fully fund our troops - but cut every other program by 50%?

bush is all squinty-eyed. he's serious... 20,000+ troops are coming home? how many, how soon? i'll be interested in hearing the specifics on this plan. is it part of the regular rotation?

al qaeda in iraq isn't who you need to worry about, sir. it's the resurgence of al qaeda in afghanistan, you idiot.

yes...let's measure progress by progress in baghdad.... umm - you're failing! and where exactly is reconciliation taking place?

"a free iraq will deny al qaeda a safe-haven." no biggie - they'll just go next door to afghanistan. i thought he remembered afghanistan tonight? he must've already forgotten it again. afghanistan forgotten: 8:50.

"we must do the difficult work today." you mean fuck up all foreign relations? destroy the environment? leave that easy work for the next generation to deal with?

israel...palestine... "imagine all the people." any plans there, big guy?

NUCLEAR! it's NUCLEAR!

oh....we're threatening and building up iran again? this all sounds a lot like his words to saddam hussein right before he invaded. ummm...i don't think iran was threatening our ships. wasn't that an american prankster that said "i am coming to bomb you"?

who are the terrorists talking to? what are they saying? "this guy is such an asshole" - probably.

wow - for the GOP not liking big government...they sure like big brother. let's listen in on everyone!

"america opposes genocide in sudan." beautiful - now what are we going to do about it?

8:57 - some polite applause from hillary.

i hope that kid isn't wearing real leopard.

wait... you mean we're going to manipulate our poorest citizens into serving in our military... and then actually take care of them when they return as veterans?

he's attempting some soaring rhetoric here towards the end... but the dipshit just can't pull it off. sorry, mr. president, but you sound like a schmuck.

9:03 - the president finishes.... just under one hour.

and thus ends his final state of the union. nothing special. nothing inspiring. thank you, buddha - i never have to listen to a state of the union by bush again.

i'll listen to some wrap-up and get back to you.

One more year... just one more year.

e.